Alexicon: A Kitty Kat’s Life wiff hiz Hoomin

Merry Cwistmaz, Eberbodiez

2011-12-25T07:39:00.002-05:00

Merry Cwistmaz to all u kittie katz, woofie doggiez, birdiez, and eben hoomin beanz. OK?

Dis be MY and Sugar'z Cwistmaz cardie, OK?

Sugar and da Kwizmaz Twee

2011-12-23T12:55:00.002-05:00

Dis be Alex and dis be mysilly fwend who libes wiff me and MY hoomin bean, Sugar.

Sugar be swilly cuaze she wantz to libe in OUR Kwizmaz twee! OK?

She be swilly katz, aint she? OK?

Diz B MY Fwend Sugar

2011-12-07T10:38:00.000-05:00

Diz be my fwend Sugar:

Sugar libes wiff ME nowz an MY hoomin bean B iz nowz Sugar's hoomin bean. OK?

Sugar b swilly kat. OK? Sometimez I haffa bopz her on da topz ob her headz. But she dunt mindz cause she b bery youngz kitty kat an she tink I be her ole bwother. OK?

Herez b somez morez pikchurez of Sugar and ME. OK?

Dat wed on Sugar's face b dat swilly kat'z tonguie!

Suger an ME, we b fwiendz now. OK? We playz lotz an we napz lotz. OK?

I showz u more pikturez ob ME an Sugar real soonz. OK?

BlogBlast for Peace

2011-11-04T10:06:00.000-04:00

Dis be MY Peace Globbie fir dis BloggieBlast fir peace.

OK?

Now U goex an seez MY hoomin bean'z Globbie fir dis BloggieBlast fir peace.

OK?

Cain and Me

2011-08-13T12:37:00.002-04:00

Hi. I be Alex. OK?

I ownz a hoomin bean named Sometimes Saintly Nick. OK?

Before ME and my hoomin bean movez to dis a-partz-ment I getz to playz outsidez and I hab lotz ob kitty kat fwiendz. OK?

But nowz da hoomin beanz here dunt letz me playz outsidez. Dey dunt letz no kitty katz playz outsidez. So I lookz outz da windowz for kitty katz butz I dunt seez no kitty katz. OK?

Dis be Anne. She comez to out partmentz to libez wiff us and helpz pay da rentz. OK?

Dis be Cain, da kitty kat dat ownz Anne. OK?

I twyz to be Cain's kitty kat buddy butz Cain be skaredy kat an he jumpz on ME an bwings blud to da scuffy partz ob my neck, I dunt likes dat. OK?

So now I hab a kastle neath dis chair an I hizzes at Cain when he comes by an sometimez we fightz an Cain he wunz awayz cause I winz da fightz. OK?

Sometimez Mz Anne she takez Cain fir a ridez. OK?

Den I comez outz frum neathz my chair an I nappiez unner my ownz sunbeam. OK?

MY hoomin bean tinkz dat he canz makez Cain an ME be buddies if we sharz kitty kat nippies. Cain doez da nip an getz sillyz but I jist lookz at da nip an at sillyz Cain. OK?

I dunt knowz if I eber be buddiez wiff Cain. I jist tinkz boutz it some moorz whilez I baffz. OK?

Lookie atz Dis Bwave Kitty Kat

2011-07-15T11:44:00.000-04:00

Dis be Alex. Lookz at dis bwave kitty kat:

OK?

It Be Spwingz Butz I dunt Bez Happiez

2011-03-22T23:13:00.001-04:00

It be Spwingz here in Louiebille. OK? But hewe in our apartment tingie I aint happiez b-kuz my hoomin bean tellz me dat kitty katz cantz goez out-side wiff outz a hoomin bean and onz a leashie. OK?

Butz I lobez to playz out-sidez by my self! OK? Do U member dis:

Dat be atz our oldz housie. OK?

Now I be boreded in dis apartzmentz. See:

OK? I be boreded!

BUTZ!!!!!! Da utter day I getz outz da door! MY hoomin bean cantz getz me! I playz outsiez as longz as I wantz and MY hoomin bean jizt standz and watches me! OK!

AND I getz out 2 morez timez affer dat!

See:

Aint dat nice!

Dis Be Alex and I B Backz

2011-03-19T22:24:00.000-04:00

Diz reallyz b Alex and diz be MY bloggie tingee! OK!

Now I be here and I b blogginz lotz. OK?

I habz Lotz ob Pikturez! OK?

2011-01-14T03:38:00.001-05:00

Hi, kitty katz and woofie doggiez and birdiez and hoomin beanz! I hab lotz ob pikturez to showz u! OK? See:

Dat be allz, fol.kz! Aint dem nice pikturez. OK?

Guess Whatz!

2010-12-18T20:01:00.000-05:00

Guess Whatz!

We I habz a Twissmaz twee!

I Be Backz!

2010-11-25T21:03:00.000-05:00

Hi, kitty katz and woofie diggiez and hoomin beanz! I been awayz a longz timez. OK? MY hoomin bean and ME moveded fwoim our housie to a wittle apartmentz. OK? Dn we hab twoublez wiff our internetz con-next-shun. OK? Den our com-puter tingie dunt workz and MY hoomin bean gibz it to a hoomin bean nameded Waw-wen to getz fisxeded. OK? But dat Waw-wen he sayz dat our com-puter tingie it canzt be fixeded to hw buildz ua NEW com-puter tingie. OK? All dat takez a berry longtz timex.OK?

OK?

I Be Boreded

2010-10-21T10:24:00.002-04:00

I be boreded. OK? So I jumpz off deskie & I tapz MY hoomin bean on hiz hind leg wiff my cwawz and; MY hoomin bean he sayz...

and den MY hoomin bean he getz upz and ~~followz~~ chasez ME into our kitchie and I jumpiez upz on MY table OK?

And MY hoomin bean he pickz ME upz and he carriez ME to da door and he putz ME down outsidez on da porchies. OK?

And guezz whatz! I aint boreded no more!

I Getz NEW Toyz!

2010-10-11T19:44:00.002-04:00

Yesserdayz MY hoomin bean and ME we watchez dis kar-tune moviez boutz Simon's Cat:

OK? Den guezz whatz! MY hoomin bean gibz ME new toyz! See:

Aint dem funz toys! OK?

It Dunt Be Hotz No Morez

2010-10-06T14:26:00.000-04:00

It dunt be hotz no morez. OK?

It be koldz! OK?

MY fav-ow-itz. OK?

2010-09-23T22:08:00.000-04:00

Hi, eberbodiez!

MY hoomin bean's everting be workingz OK now. See:

LOtz of hoomin beanz tankz MR fir lettin' MY hoomin bean putz hiz Monday Jokiez on MY bloggie thing!

Diz ne MY fav-ow-it jokie:

A man who absolutely hated his wife's cat decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park.

As he was nearing home, the cat was walking up the driveway.

The next day, he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away and try the same thing.

As he was driving back into his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat farther and farther away, but the darn cat would always beat him home.

At last, he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right and so on until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and he left the cat there.

Hours later, the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?"

"Yes," the wife answers. "Why do you ask?"

Frustrated, the man answers: "Put that damn cat on the phone. I'm lost and I need directions!"

Dis be MY fav-ow-it moviez:

OK?

MY Hoomin Bean'z Mondayz Jokiez

2010-09-20T09:11:00.000-04:00

MY hoomin bean, Sometimes Saintly Nick, cant do hiz bloggie, Nick's Bytes, cause somez nassy hoomin bean hackeded hiz i-den-tit-ee.

OK? Eber Mondayz MY hoomin bean putz jokiez on hiz bloggie dat be sentz to him in hiz emails.OK? Dey be nameded Too Bad It Be Mondayz. OK?

So I tellz MY hoomin bean dat he canz puts dem jokies on MY bloggie dis Mondayz. OK?

MY hoomin bean aint gotz butz a bery feaz jokiez cause he dunt getz hiz emailiez. OK?

Here be what My hoomin bean haz. OK?

A vet gets a midnight phone call from a farmer. "I`ve got a very constipated cow - been like it for days, it`s in great pain, what can I do?"

Sleepy vet, knackered after working all day and all evening, says: "If you`ve got one of those small bottles of highly concentrated milk of magnesia, get that down it and I`ll call you in the morning to see how it is."

Next morning the vet rings: "How`s the constipated cow this morning?"

"Cow?" says the farmer. "I said cat."

"Oh God," says the vet, "did you give it the concentrate?"

"Yes, I got the whole bottleful down its throat, I used a small funnel."

"Oh Jesus," says the vet. "how is the cat?"

"It`s out in the garden."

"Dead I suppose?" said the vet.

"God no," said the farmer, "he`s out there with four of his mates, two digging and two filling in."

A group of children were trying very hard to become accustomed to nursery.

The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk! You need to use 'Big People' words,' she was always reminding them.

She asked John what he had done over the weekend?

'I went to visit my Nana'..

No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER.

Use 'Big People' words!'

She then asked Mitchell what he had done

'I took a ride on a choo-choo'.

She said. 'No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use 'Big People' words'.

She then asked little Alex what he had done?

'I read a book' he replied.

That's WONDERFUL!' the teacher said.

'What book did you read?'

Alex thought real hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride, and said,

'Winnie the SHIT'

I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them, 'If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?'

' NO!' the children answered.

' If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?'

Again, the answer was 'NO!'

By now I was starting to smile. 'Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?

Again, they all answered 'NO!'.

I was just bursting with pride for them. I continued, '

Then how can I get into heaven?'

A six year-old boy shouted out: "FIRST YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN' DEAD...."

It's a curious race, the Irish.

This is an old joke that I’ve posted before; Since it is Alex's favorite joke, I’ll post it again:

A man who absolutely hated his wife's cat decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park.

As he was nearing home, the cat was walking up the driveway.

The next day, he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away and try the same thing.

As he was driving back into his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat farther and farther away, but the darn cat would always beat him home.

At last, he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right and so on until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and he left the cat there.

Hours later, the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?"

"Yes," the wife answers. "Why do you ask?"

Frustrated, the man answers: "Put that damn cat on the phone. I'm lost and I need directions!"

KATZ

Dis be Alex. OK?

Datz all dem jokies. OK?

Now I nomz. OK?

Me & MY Hoomin Bean

2010-09-15T15:33:00.001-04:00

I watchez da telebision wiff MY hoomin bean. See

Sometimez MY hoomin bean sayz dat he no be ablez to seez telebision cause I be in hiz ways. OK?

Butz mostz ob da timez MY hoomin bean jist nappiez. OK?

Happyz Laybowz Dayz Eberbodiez

2010-09-06T05:37:00.000-04:00

HAPPY LAY-BOWZ DAYZ, EBERBODIEZ!

I be nappiez lotz todayz!

OK?

I Notz Be Garfield

2010-08-20T07:34:00.000-04:00

Goodz morninz, all ob u kitty katz, woofy doggiez, and hoomin beanz!

U knowed dat I likez da kitty kat nameded Grafield, dunt u?

OK? But I dunt be likez Garfield in dem pikturez up dere.

Lookee herez:

OK?

Lookee What MY Hoomin Bean Dided

2010-08-10T21:54:00.000-04:00

MY hoomin bean putz dis paintingz as da pikture on hiz cwedit cawd:

Aintz dat nice? OK?

A Bery Specialz Kitty Kat

2010-07-25T14:52:00.000-04:00

Dis be a bery specialz and bwave kitty kat. I feelz sadz and happyz when I lookz at him.

OK?

Blogginz

2010-07-16T16:27:00.000-04:00

I be makin' a new bloggie post:

OK?

Butz I needz to nappiez now.

OK?

Nuffin...OK

2010-07-08T11:58:00.001-04:00

Hi, kitty katz an woofie doggiez and hoomin beans. I ain't writed much cause der aint nuffin happenin. OK? It be 2 hotz to katz awoundz outsidez. OK?

Sometimez I nappiez in MY hoomin beanz litter box woom wherez it be cool:

OK? Den sometiez I nappiez wiff MY hoomin bean:

OK? Den sometimez I snuddlez wiff MY hoomin bean:

OK? Den sometimez I sitz on topz ob da table in fwont ob da big win-dow and jist lookz outsidez and some timez I playz:.

OK? Den sometimez I sitz in MY hoomin beanz chair

OK? Dere I sitz til MY hoomin bean hab dun hiz fiz-a-kal ther-a-peez and den we weads a bookie boutz my fav-o-rite kitty kat de-tek-tive Koko and da hoomin bean dat Koko ownz.

Dun u weadz diz bookie? It be bery goodz

The Cat Who Wasn't There

OK? So, u seez dat I really aint be doin nuffin much because it be sooooo hotz.

OK?

Diz Alex Ain't ME! OK?

2010-06-29T16:31:00.001-04:00

Diz Alex dat be a nassy storm ain't ME!

OK?

I be bzzy huntinz a wittle mousy dat I seez runz behindz our stove thingie.

OK?

MY Hoomin Bean Daddy Kat

2010-06-19T11:53:00.000-04:00

I dunt member my kitty kat daddy kat. I do member my mommy kat but notz bery well ‘cause MY hoomin bean telled ME that the nassy peeples at the petz store taked ME way fwom my mommy kat fore I was oldz nuff to stop drinkin’ her kitty kat milk and datz how comed I almost died whenz I waz a baby ketteh. OK?

So I gussed my hoomin bean haaz been MY daddy and MY mommy even though he ain’t a kitty cat. OK?

So on hoomin’s Fathers Day I jist wantz to sayz I hab a bery bery nice hoomin bean daddy cat.

Diz Be June and June Be...

2010-06-03T20:55:00.024-04:00

Adopt a Kitty Kat Month

OK?

Da American Humane Society sayz dat:

June is American Humane's Adopt-A-Cat Month
Give a shelter cat a starring role in your life!

Approximately 4 million cats end up in shelters every year, including thousands born every spring and summer during “kitten season.” To help promote adoptions of these fun, affectionate animals, American Humane celebrates Adopt-A-Cat Month each June.

Your local shelter is brimming with cats of every breed, age and personality just waiting for a loving home. Whether you prefer young and frisky or mature and mellow, you’re sure to find the perfect cat companion during Adopt-A-Cat Month!

OK?

If u be a hoomin bean an if u dunt be owneded by a kitty kat, da pikturez dat I putz next iz why u needz to goez to da animalz shlter now an be adopteded by a kitty kat. OK?

Dat fiwst pikture be ob ME an MY hoomin bean. OK?

Now U adoptz kitty kat?

Pikturez ob ME

2010-05-19T05:49:00.005-04:00

Here be somez pikturez ob ME! OK?

Dunt I lookz sillys!

MY hoomin bean and ME, WE dunt likez NEATZ. ok?

I likez dem kitty kat tweatz. OK?

I likez 2 playz chess wiff MY hoomin bean. OK?

Sometimez I nappiez where MY hoomin bean dunt seez ME. OK?

Dis be MY fa-vor-ite nappie spot. OK?

But sometimez I nappiez on dis chair. OK?

Dis be allz, folkz! I gonna nappy napz. OK?

Outz Sidez

2010-05-13T22:09:00.000-04:00

It be a bery nice day todayz and boff ME and MY hoomin bean pwayz outsidez lotz. OK?

Mudders Day Storiez

2010-05-09T01:12:00.001-04:00

Today be Mudder's Dat. OK? U knowz, dunt u, dat MY hoomin bean he be MY mudder since I be too littlez to be awayz from MY Mommy Kat. If U dunt knowz dat den I habz MY hoomin bean tells dat story againz. OK? (It be a longs story).

Dis be da story ob whatz happenz almostz 5 yearz agoz jist affer I iz bornz, OK?

Perhaps now would be an appropriate time to share the story of the most traumatic (for both Alex and me) event of his kittenhood. I purchased Alex from a pet store on Preston Highway in Louisville, not too far from my mother's home. He was one of four kittens that the store had for sale and, as people who have seen him or photographs of him have noted, Alex has very unique markings. The black coloring on his white coat above his left eye, his black right nostril, and his "ring tailed" tail are not all of them. He also had black ovals on his hind legs, which I have never been able to photograph because Alex is such a ham that he always wants to face my camera. Without a doubt, Alex was the cutest of the four siblings in the store.

The clerk at the pet store sold me all that he said was needed for a happy and well-cared-for kitten: a cat carrier (then much too big for the little fellow, but which he has since out grown), a litter box, cat litter, food and drink bowls, and, most importantly, a large bag of dry kitten food that the clerk said was what Alex had been normally eating.

It was on a Wednesday in January when I purchased the kitten who would become the cat who owns me. After we arrived home, I telephoned the vet who had so well tended my dog, Muffin (another story I've yet to share), and made an appointment to have her look at Alex the following Monday. During the next few days, Alex seemed to adjust well to life in my house. He explored and climbed (just a bit) and was held and cuttled (quite a bit). He developed his since refined habit of climbing up (he now leaps up from the floor) the comforter of my bed and then crawls beneath it to snuggle with me at night.

Each day when I came home from the church I was pastoring, I'd find Alex sitting in the living room awaiting my arrival. It felt great to be welcomed home by the little fellow. It felt great to share my house with another warm blooded creature.

That Sunday I left for the church at 7:00 a.m. to prepare for the morning worship service. When I returned home, Alex wasn't snuggled on the living room couch as he had been the previous days. I wasn't concerned; I thought that he might be in the kitchen, dining. But Alex wasn't in the kitchen. I found him sprawled on the hardwood floor of my library. He couldn't move, he couldn't stand. He looked up at me with frightened eyes as I lifted him into my arms.

I didn't hesitate. Since I knew that my vet was closed on Sundays, I wrapped Alex in a blanket and drove him to a vet I knew had a practice a few blocks from my house. There I found that the only person in the clinic was a woman who came in on Sundays to feed the animals. She told me that the only vet she knew who was open was at a 24-hour-emergency animal clinic in Middletown, Kentucky, about fifteen miles away. I drove there and carried Alex wrapped in his blanket into the clinic.

An assistant took my kitten from me and disappeared through a door. I waited. I waited for what seemed to be a very long time before I was it invited to speak with one of the vetinarians on duty. He told me that Alex was very ill and he did not know if my kitten would live. The vet estimated Alex to be only about four weeks old and much too young to be separated from his mommy. He also told me that Alex should not have been sold, especially by a pet shop, who should have know better. Alex was much too young to eat and digest the dry kitten food that the store clerk had said was his normal diet. He should have still been drinking his mommy's milk.

The vet's diagnosis was that Alex was suffering from hypothermia, caused by the cold January floor and his inability to generate body heat because he couldn't digest the kitten food, anemia, and hypoglycemia. His prognosis was poor. He allowed me to visit my little fellow and what I saw was heart-rending: Alex had two IVs going into him and was just lying there.

Alex remained hospitalized for four days (and $800.00). I visited him each day. On the third day the vet told me that my kitten would "make it" and I was over overjoyed. It was on that day that I was able to hold and cuddle the little fellow again. The next afternoon, when Alex was released from the animal hospital, the vet gave me a whole list of actions to take, including (1) if I was to continue feeding him dry kitten food, I was to moisten it in warm water for a few minutes until the food was soft before giving it to him; (2) when I left the house, I was to place Alex in his cat carrier and place the carrier well above the cold floor; and (3) the vet suggested that I report the pet store to the humane society for selling a kitten too young to be weaned. I did all three and more.

So dats how it be when I waz jist a bery little kitty kat. OK? And MY hoomin bean he be MY mommy kat for a bery long time,. OK? And so I helps MY hoomin bean makes Mudders Day card for hiz hoomin mommy.

See, dis be day frontz:

OK?

And diz be whatz onz da insidez::

OK?

Aint dat nice?

HAPPY MUDDERS DAY, EBERBODIES!

(MY HOOMIN BEAN, TOO)

Big Nassy Kitty Kat!

2010-05-05T06:40:00.002-04:00

Der be a bery nasy and bery bigz kitty kat dat be outsidez Monday nite and she swippeded her cwaws atz ME & I runz bery fasz into our housey and MY hoomin bean gwabz Me & putz yucky medizinez on MY neck. OK?

So lass night I dunt go katting aroundz. I sitz on our porchey and looks out at da nite til MY hoomin bean tellz me it be time for us to sleepz. OK?

Butz beforez we sleepz, MY hoomin bean sungglez ME & he gibz ME some kitty kat tweats!

OK?

Dis Now Be MY Fav-o-rite Songz

2010-04-27T16:38:00.000-04:00

MY hoomin bean playeded and singeded dis songie to ME. OK?

Butz WE canz notz gets OUR video makin tingie to workz onz OUR computerie so MY hoomin bean he up-loadz da songie singeded by dis hoomin bean who be nameded Cisco Houston. OK?

Dis songie be nameded The Cat Came Back and dis songie gotz lotz more versiez den any hoomin bean eber sings. OK?

The Cat Came Back

Old Mister Johnson had troubles of his own
He had a yellow cat which wouldn't leave its home;
He tried and he tried to give the cat away,
He gave it to a man goin' far, far away.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

The man around the corner swore he'd kill the cat on sight,
He loaded up his shotgun with nails and dynamite;
He waited and he waited for the cat to come around,
Ninety seven pieces of the man is all they found.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

He gave it to a little boy with a dollar note,
Told him for to take it up the river in a boat;
They tied a rope around its neck, it must have weighed a pound
Now they drag the river for a little boy that's drowned.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

He gave it to a man going up in a balloon,
He told him for to take it to the man in the moon;
The balloon came down about ninety miles away,
Where he is now, well I dare not say.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

He gave it to a man going way out West,
Told him for to take it to the one he loved the best;
First the train hit the curve, then it jumped the rail,
Not a soul was left behind to tell the gruesome tale.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

The cat it had some company one night out in the yard,
Someone threw a boot-jack, and they threw it mighty hard;
It caught the cat behind the ear, she thought it rather slight,
When along came a brick-bat and knocked the cat out of sight

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

Away across the ocean they did send the cat at last,
Vessel only out a day and making water fast;
People all began to pray, the boat began to toss,
A great big gust of wind came by and every soul was lost.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

On a telegraph wire, sparrows sitting in a bunch,
The cat was feeling hungry, thought she'd like 'em for a lunch;
Climbing softly up the pole, and when she reached the top,
Put her foot upon the electric wire, which tied her in a knot.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

The cat was a possessor of a family of its own,
With seven little kittens till there came a cyclone;
Blew the houses all apart and tossed the cat around,
The air was full of kittens, and not a one was ever found.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

The atom bomb fell just the other day,
The H-Bomb fell in the very same way;
Russia went, England went, and then the U.S.A.
The human race was finished without a chance to pray.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

~Written By: Harry S. Miller (with later folk additions), Copyright Unknown

So, here be The Cat Came Back singeded by Cisco Houston:

OK?

Happy Earff Day!

2010-04-22T19:42:00.000-04:00

Happy Earff Day, eberbodiez!

OK?

Nother Nappiez Chair

2010-04-14T23:52:00.000-04:00

Guess whatz?

When I dunt nappiez in my new nappiez chair

den I be on my hoomin bean'z nappiez chair!

See:

OK?

My New Nappiez Chair

2010-04-06T15:25:00.002-04:00

ME and MY hoomin bean habz a bery nice Easser. OK?

Den MY hoomin bean he bwingz chair into hiz libwawy so dat MY hoomin bean and hiz fwiend can playz chessie. (I dunt knowz howz to playz chessie. OK?) See:

Den I findz outz dat dat chair be a bery, bery nice place to take nappiez. OK? See:

I likez dat! OK?

HAPPYZ EASSER, EBERBODIEZ!

2010-04-03T22:27:00.000-04:00

HE IS RISEN!

Happyz Easser, Eberbodiez!

Seez, I spelleded it ritez!

OK?

Eawff Houw Be Ober Now

2010-03-28T03:31:00.000-04:00

Da Eawff Houw be ober nowz.

When it be darkz I nappiez.

OK?

Earff Houw Be in 2 Houwz!

2010-03-27T18:22:00.007-04:00

In 2 houws it be Earff Houw be HERE and MY hoomin bean and ME turnz off all da powewz to helps da earff. OK?

OK?

It Be SPRING!

2010-03-21T13:28:00.011-04:00

It be SPRINGZ!

I likez Springz!

OK?

Diz Be MY Day

2010-02-13T12:05:00.004-05:00

Diz be howz I spendz MY day. OK?

I wakez upz & I findz MY hoomin bean & I tellz MY hoomin bean dat I wantz my bweakfastie:fast:

I eatz MY fiwst bweakfastie:

I tellz MY hoomin bean to openz doow fir ME:

I seez dis!

So I tellz MY hoomin bean notz to shutz door & I sitz & lookz outsidez. OK?

I sitz & nappiez fir a bitz. OK?

Den I lookz atz da doow againz but MY hoomin sayz dat nassy fluffy wasser still be outsides.

I dwinkz somez of da milkiez dat MY hoomin bean dwinkz wiff hiz medi-cinez. MY hommin bean aint happyz wiff me.

So I goez to our beddie wherez I takez bery longz nappiez.

When I wakez upz I gibbz myselfz a baffie

I tellz MY hoomin bean dat I wantz MY lunchie

I eatz MY lunchie

MY hoomin bean holdz ME & I gwoomz hiz beardz.

MY hoomin bean getz MY birdie onz a stwing toy & we playz wiff it.

I getz somez kitty kat tweatz fwomz MY hoomin bean.

Den I nappiez a wittle & den I makez diz bloggie. OK?

\
Tomowwow be Balentine'z Day & Balentine'z Day be MY hoomin bean'z bwiffday & he askz dat eber kitty kat & woofie doggie & hoomin bean comez to a party atz hiz bloggie tingie. OK?

Nick's Bytes

OK?

More Nassy Fluffy Wasserz!

2010-02-08T22:55:00.004-05:00

MY hoomin beans sayz dat da nassy fluffy wasserz dat be fallinz wight nowz be fallinz untilz WEDNESDAY!

OK?

Today We Seez Pawz-ballz! OK?

2010-02-07T02:38:00.002-05:00

Der be nassy, fluffyz, white wasser outsidez again...

butz I duntz carez 'cause today ME & MY hoomin bean...

r gonna watch somez pawz-ballz!

OK? I hab lotz ob kitty kat tweats to eatz...

& ME & MY hoomin bean r gonna hab lotz ob funz! OK?

OK?

I Be Bery Bwave Kitty Katz!

2010-02-04T17:09:00.002-05:00

Lookee:

Dem be MY pawz pwintz in da nassy, fluffy, whitez wasserz! OK? I bez soooooooooo tiwed ob notz goingz outsidez to playz & kat awound dat I goez outz on our porchie & lookz awound. OK?

But MY pawz getz kold & wetz soooooooooooo I comez insidez & lookz outz da window 'tilz all dat nassy, fluffy, whitez wasserz meltz! OK?

OK?

Diz Be Howz I Keepiez Warmz & Haiti

2010-01-20T23:31:00.014-05:00

WE--ME & MY hoomin bean--WE gotz a new e-lek-twik blankie! OK? It be bery, bery, bery warmz! OK?

Eben whenz I nappiez on topz ob da blankie it be bery warmz. OK?

Sometimez MY silly hoomin bean makez me getz up. OK?

Den MY silly hoomin bean he hidez de e-lek-twik blankie unner dat big blankie & I nappiez on topz of it tilz MY hoomin bean comez & WE nappiez unner da bery bery warmz e-lek-twik blankie. OK?

Dis be boutz Haiti:

My hoomin bean & ME, we watchez da telebizon & we seez all ob da badz tingz dat happenz to dem dat libez in Haiti. I dunt knowz where Haiti be but MY hoomin bean he tellz me allz about Haiti & boutz hiz bery good fwiend nameded Bishop Octomoliere Liberius

Diz be whatz I sayz:

Diz be whatz MY hoomin bean pwayz:

OK?

Dere Be Nassy Snowz Outsidez

2010-01-07T12:55:00.012-05:00

MY sillyz hoomin bean he tellz me dat dere be nassy snowz outsidez. OK?

Butz I duntz believez himz? OK? So MY hoomin bean he openz da doorie & I lookiez outsidez. OK?

I lookiez & I lookiez outsidez. OK?

Lookee look! U seez da nassy fluffyz wasserz dat be outsidez. OK?

So I duntz goez outsidez & playz. I dunt likez dat fluffyz whitez wasserz.

OK?

We Hopez Dat U Be Habinz a Bery Nice Newz Yearz

2010-01-01T06:55:00.004-05:00

OK?

MY hioomin bean he sayz dis to eber bodiez:

May 2010 bring you
Walls for the wind
And a roof for the rain,
And drinks bedside the fire
Laughter to cheer you
And those you love near you,
And all that your heart may desire

OK?

Happyz Newz Yearz, Eber Buddiez

2009-12-31T10:38:00.006-05:00

MY hoomin bean & ME, we sayz to eber kitty kat, hoomin bean, & eben ebber woofie doggy dis:

Guezz whatz MY hoomin bean & ME gonna seez 2-nitez?

I likez deez mobiez! OK?

Mewwy Kwistmaz Eberbodiez! OK?

2009-12-25T00:14:00.002-05:00

Diz be MY hoomin bean'z & MY Kwistmaz card. OK?

I hopez dat eber kitty kat, woofie doggie, birdie, & hoomin bean habz a bery mewwy Kwistmaz! OK?

MY Kwistmaz Sockin!

2009-12-23T14:02:00.007-05:00

I weally wikez Kwistmaz! OK?

Dat 'cause I gotz MY ownz Kwistmaz Sockin! Seez:

I Catcheded on Fiwez!

2009-12-20T07:55:00.006-05:00

Lass nightz I be on our deskie tingie & I sitz downz on MY silly hoomun bean'z ashie tway & der be a buwnin' cit-ter-ettz inz da ashie tway & MY furz stawtz buwnin' & I dunt knoweded it untilz MY hoomin bean he gwabz ME upz weal fastie & wubz MY furz bwery hardz & den he spitz on MY furz & wubz some mowez. OK?

I be OK! MY skinz dunt getz buwneded--jist a wittle bitz of MY furz. OK?

Butz I dunt likez it dat MY silly hoomin bean he puts HIZ spitz on MY furz! OK?

I Sayz Lotz Boutz Kold

2009-12-15T14:40:00.010-05:00

MY hoomin bean putz dis blankie onz hiz legz whenz he sitz in hoz wheelchairz. OK? When it notz be onz hiz legz it be onz a nutter chairz. OK? But den dis blankie fallz on da floorz (I helpz it fallz) & now I makez it be a nappie nesty fir ME cause I dunt likez da kold floorz. OK?

Hi, kitty katz & woofie doggies & wittle birdiez & hoomin beanz!

Dun u seez dat I writes lotz boutz beingz kold? Dat be cause I almostz diez dromz beingz koldz whenz I be a bery lill kitteh. OK?

I knowz dat kitty katz & woofie doggies & wittle birdiez & hoomin beanz dunt likez to mousie klickz allz ober da place to udder bloogie tingiez. OK? So I tellz MY hoomin bean to movez fromz his bloggie tingie calleded Nick's Bytes dis story dat MY hoomin bean ritez backz in 2007 dat iz calleded Alex & the Cold to MY bloggie tingie so dat U canz readz aboutz whenz I be bery sickz cause of da kold & nassy hoomin beanz who takez ME awayz drom MY mommie kat whenz I be too littlez notz to be wiff MY monnie kat. OK? Whew! Dat waz lotz of writinz fir MY pawz.

Dis be da story od whatz happenz almostz 5 yearz agoz jist affer I iz bornz, OK?

Perhaps now would be an appropriate time to share the story of the most traumatic (for both Alex and me) event of his kittenhood. I purchased Alex from a pet store on Preston Highway in Louisville, not too far from my mother's home. He was one of four kittens that the store had for sale and, as people who have seen him or photographs of him have noted, Alex has very unique markings. The black coloring on his white coat above his left eye, his black right nostril, and his "ring tailed" tail are not all of them. He also had black ovals on his hind legs, which I have never been able to photograph because Alex is such a ham that he always wants to face my camera. Without a doubt, Alex was the cutest of the four siblings in the store.

The clerk at the pet store sold me all that he said was needed for a happy and well-cared-for kitten: a cat carrier (then much too big for the little fellow, but which he has since out grown), a litter box, cat litter, food and drink bowls, and, most importantly, a large bag of dry kitten food that the clerk said was what Alex had been normally eating.

It was on a Wednesday in January when I purchased the kitten who would become the cat who owns me. After we arrived home, I telephoned the vet who had so well tended my dog, Muffin (another story I've yet to share), and made an appointment to have her look at Alex the following Monday. During the next few days, Alex seemed to adjust well to life in my house. He explored and climbed (just a bit) and was held and cuttled (quite a bit). He developed his since refined habit of climbing up (he now leaps up from the floor) the comforter of my bed and then crawls beneath it to snuggle with me at night.

Each day when I came home from the church I was pastoring, I'd find Alex sitting in the living room awaiting my arrival. It felt great to be welcomed home by the little fellow. It felt great to share my house with another warm blooded creature.

That Sunday I left for the church at 7:00 a.m. to prepare for the morning worship service. When I returned home, Alex wasn't snuggled on the living room couch as he had been the previous days. I wasn't concerned; I thought that he might be in the kitchen, dining. But Alex wasn't in the kitchen. I found him sprawled on the hardwood floor of my library. He couldn't move, he couldn't stand. He looked up at me with frightened eyes as I lifted him into my arms.

I didn't hesitate. Since I knew that my vet was closed on Sundays, I wrapped Alex in a blanket and drove him to a vet I knew had a practice a few blocks from my house. There I found that the only person in the clinic was a woman who came in on Sundays to feed the animals. She told me that the only vet she knew who was open was at a 24-hour-emergency animal clinic in Middletown, Kentucky, about fifteen miles away. I drove there and carried Alex wrapped in his blanket into the clinic.

An assistant took my kitten from me and disappeared through a door. I waited. I waited for what seemed to be a very long time before I was it invited to speak with one of the vetinarians on duty. He told me that Alex was very ill and he did not know if my kitten would live. The vet estimated Alex to be only about four weeks old and much too young to be separated from his mommy. He also told me that Alex should not have been sold, especially by a pet shop, who should have know better. Alex was much too young to eat and digest the dry kitten food that the store clerk had said was his normal diet. He should have still been drinking his mommy's milk.

The vet's diagnosis was that Alex was suffering from hypothermia, caused by the cold January floor and his inability to generate body heat because he couldn't digest the kitten food, anemia, and hypoglycemia. His prognosis was poor. He allowed me to visit my little fellow and what I saw was heart-rending: Alex had two IVs going into him and was just lying there.

Alex remained hospitalized for four days (and $800.00). I visited him each day. On the third day the vet told me that my kitten would "make it" and I was over overjoyed. It was on that day that I was able to hold and cuddle the little fellow again. The next afternoon, when Alex was released from the animal hospital, the vet gave me a whole list of actions to take, including (1) if I was to continue feeding him dry kitten food, I was to moisten it in warm water for a few minutes until the food was soft before giving it to him; (2) when I left the house, I was to place Alex in his cat carrier and place the carrier well above the cold floor; and (3) the vet suggested that I report the pet store to the humane society for selling a kitten too young to be weaned. I did all three and more.

It Be Koldz Outsidez

2009-12-10T10:28:00.003-05:00

It be too koldz to catz aroundz outsidez. OK? So I tellz MY hoomin bean to openz doorie so dat I canz looks outsidez. OK? But it be too koldz to sitz in doorie wayz so I sitz backz here & I looks out da doorie. OK?

MY hoomin bean he dunt likez dat. MY hoomin bean sayz dat da openz doorie letz heatz out & koldz in. OK? Still he be nice hoomin bean & he dunt closez doorie until I be dunz lookingz out. OK? Aint dat nice ob MY hoomin bean?

OK?

We Seez Pawz-Ballz on da Telebizion!

2009-12-07T09:10:00.001-05:00

Yesserday it be bery coldz outsidez. OK? So MY hoomin bean & ME we sitz & we seez pawz-ballz on da telebizion. OK? But MY hoomin bean sayz dat he seez morez ob MY tailz-end den da pawz-ballz game. OK?

Guess whatz? MY hoomin bean takez deez pikturez all byz hiz selfz wiff jist one ob hiz paws. OK? He sayz dat he canz do dat because he haz thumbz. OK? What be thumbz?

2009-12-04T09:04:00.006-05:00

Lookeez! MY hoomin bean startz a new bloggiee tingie! The new bloggie tingie ob MY hoomin bean aint gotz nuffinz onz it ceptz PIKTURES! Seez:

Nick's Pics

Guezz whatz! Todayz MY hoomin bean showz pikturez ob ME! Jist ME! OK?

Aint dat be nice ob MY hoomin bean?

OK?

Today Be Wowld AIDS Day

2009-12-01T00:01:00.010-05:00

Today be Wowld AIDS Day. OK?

Dis AIDS maked hoomin beanz bery, bery, bery sickz. OK? Eben bery littlez hoomin beanz be very bery sickz. OK? Bunchez ob hoomin beanz eben diez fwom dis nassy AIDS/ OK?

See:

Eber bodiez needz 2 wowkz togetherz to stopz dis nassy AIDS!

OK?

Da Kwit-ter Comez Backz!

2009-11-28T18:34:00.011-05:00

Dun U memberz dis kwit-ter?

It be onz our deckie tingie boutz 2 yeawz agoz. OK?

MY hoomin bean takez da pikturez ob dat kwit-ter but MY hoomin bean dunt getz bery klose to dat kwit-ter. OK? I standz behindz MY hoomin bean & den we bothz goez intoz da housie & closez da doorie to da deckie tingie. OK?

Well, dat kwit-ter comez backz tonightz! Whenz I seez dat kwit-ter I jumpz offz da deckie tingie & I runz roundz da housie & I scwatch on da frontz doorie untilz MY hoomin beanz openz da doorie so dat I canz runz insidez. OK?

I dunt goez backz outsidez tonightz! OK? I eatz dinnerz...

& den I nappez. OK?

Happyz Tankzgibinz! OK?

2009-11-25T13:55:00.011-05:00

Diz be da timez fir Tankzgibinz!

OK?

So I sayz....

Pweaz memberz whatz MY hoomin bean sayz:

OK?

My Sillyz Hoomin Bean Fallz on hiz Azz!

2009-11-23T13:01:00.001-05:00

Yesterday MY sillyz hoomin bean comes down the hallwayz so dat he canz be outsidez wiff me on da deckie. OK?

Den MY sillyz hoomin bean dunt liftz hiz hind pawz upz nuff & MY sillyz hoomin bean twipz ober dis tinkie on da floorz. Seez:

But HE DUNT HURTZ HIZ SELFZ BERY BADZ ‘CAUSE MY SILLYZ HOOMIN BEAN FALLS ON HIZ AZZ & NOTZ ON HIZ FACIE! OK?

So I runz to him & I helpz MY sillyz hoomin bean getz upz off da floorie. OK?

So MY sillyz hoomin bean gibz ME somez bery nice kitty kat tweatz. OK?

Den MY sillyz hoomin bean & ME watchez footzballz on da TV tingie.

& MY sillyz hoomin bean dwinkz a beerz!

OK?

MY Silly Hoomin Bean Messes wiff MY Pikturez!

2009-11-21T19:25:00.004-05:00

Lookee whatz my silly hoomin bean doeded! He takez MY pikturez & he turnz dem into whatz he sayz iz artz likez be in atrtz gal-la-riez, whatzeber dey be. OK? I tink that MY silly hoomin bean jist messes upz MY pretty pikturez! Dunt u?

OK?

Post Impressionist

Water Color

Impressionist

Classic Oil on Canvas

MY hoomin bean messes wiff HIS pikturez, 2. Seez:

Impressionist

Aint all of dis bery, bery sillyz?

OK?

I Be Boreded

2009-11-19T12:58:00.004-05:00

Der aint noz kitty katz outsidez da frontz doorz. OK?

Der aint no kitty katz outsidez da backz doorz. OK?

Der aint noz sun-beamz outsidez atz all. OK?

I eatz 2 breakfastiez & a lunchie & bunchez of kitty kat treatz. OK?

MY hoomin bean cuddlez ME & he brushez my fur lotz. And MY hoomin bean openz doorz so dat I canz lookz outsidez. OK?

Butz der aint nuffinz fir ME to do dat I wantz to do. OK?

So I nappiez. OK?

Dey Comez fwom Eber-wherez!

2009-11-18T07:11:00.006-05:00

Lookee atz all da placez dat kitty katz & woofie doggiez & hoomin beanz libez dat comez & wisitz my bloggie tingie:

Ifz u clickiez dat mappie tingie wiff ur mousie tingie den dat mappie tingie getz REAL BIG! OK?

Ain't dat nice dat all dem comez to my bloggie tingie?

OK?

Yesser dayz be bery, bery nice

2009-11-10T11:34:00.027-05:00

Yesser dayz be a bery, bery nice day! OK? I habz lotz ob funz! OK?

Seez, I showz u (U clickz dem pikturez wiff ur mousey & dey getz LOTZ biggerz! OK?):

I tellz MY hoomin bean dat I wantz to goez outsidez. OK?

I goez outsidez on OUR deckie. OK?

Dis iz whatz MY hoomin bean sayz iz MY perchie. OK?

Seez

All dem tweez lookz nice in dere autumnz leafz. OK?

Dis be MY fwend, Squirl, dat be nex doorz but he dunt libz dere. OK?

My fwend Squirl dunt stayz dere bery longz. OK?

Dis be da woofie doggie dat libz in da udder nex doorz. OK?

Affer longz timez, I callz MY hoomin bean. OK?

I tellz MY hoomin bean to letz ME backz insidez OUR housie. OK?

I tellz MY hoomin bean dat We goez into da kitchen. OK?

So I eatz MY dinnerz. OK?

Den I nappiez on OUR deskie. OK?

Bloggy Blastz fir PEACE! OK?

2009-11-05T00:01:00.002-05:00

Dis be MY peace globie tingie! OK? Dun u likez it?

Dis be MY hoomin beanz peace globie. OK? He haz a songie on hiz peace globie. OK?

Sooooo I tellz MY hoomin bean dat I wantz songie onz MY Bloggy Blastz fir PEACE, too! OK? And MY hoomin bean he helpz ME putz dis songie on my bloggie. OK? It be nameded Blowin' in the Windz. OK? You canz pushie buttonie on dis thingie and den you hears da songie. OK?

I Canst Katz Awoundz Tonightz

2009-10-31T00:01:00.001-04:00

My silly hoomin bean sayz dat I cantz goez outsidez & catz awaound tonughtz cause it be Hal-low-een & nassy hoomin beanz sometimez hurtz lill kitty katz onz Hal-low-een. OK?

I dunt tink dat be bery nice OK?

A New Nappie Pwace

2009-10-26T09:02:00.007-04:00

I findz a new & bery nice nappie pwace! OK?

MY hoomin beanz'z shirtie iz bery softz and warmz. OK?

I tellz MY hoomin bean dat he pweaze notz movez dat shirtie. OK?

I Be Boreded

2009-10-22T17:31:00.008-04:00

Hi kitty katz & woffie dogz & hoomun beanz!

MY ownz sunbeamz he dunz goeded awayz so dat I cantz playz wiff him. OK?

U knowz dat I getz TWO SHOTZ lass weekz fwom MY vet? OK? MY hoomin bean he getz ONE shotz yesserday for da flewz. OK? So todayz MY hoomin bean he dunt fellz goodz so he jist playz wiff me in da morningz fore he getz sickz. OK?

So nowz I aint gotz no bodiez to playz wiff cause it be 2 COLDZ fir ME 2 playz outsidez wiff MY kitty kat fwiendz & eben da woofie doggie nex door aint outsidez. OK?

So I be boreded. OK?

So I nappiez lotz.

OK?

I Goez to Seez MY Kitty Kat Dok-tor OK?

2009-10-19T17:15:00.001-04:00

Lass Fry-day I goez to seez Caryl, MY kitty kat dok-tor. I dunt wantz to, but MY silly hoomin bean he pickz me upz likez we gonna cuddlez & den he stuffz--Yeth! STUFFZ--ME intoz my kitty kat carrier & dwivez ME to da kitty kat hozpitzal. (Der be woofie doggies & a bidrie too atz dat hozpitzal). OK?

Doktor Caryl sayz dat I haz dat I haz "alergic dermatitis" whatz-eber dat iz. U member winz all dem hairz comez outz ob my tummy? I writz boutz it here. Dat is da samez ting dat I haz nowz, butz de hairz comez outz ob my buttz & tail & notz my tummy. OK?

So Doktor Caryl she gibz me TWO shotz. I dunt likz dat. OK? Butz Doktor Caryl she sayz dat wiff 1 of den shitz I dunt haz to takez pillz eber day bi morez! Aint dat nice? I weally liz dat! OK?

Whenz we getz homez I goez to my new nappin place dat I findz. Did I tell u allz bout dis nappin place? It be bery cozy & da ting in da floorz dat haz warmz airz comin outz ob it iz besidez MY new nappin place dat I findz! So I be bery cozy & warmz whenz I naps dere. OK?

Canz U seez me inz MY cozy nappin place:

OK?

I dunt wantz to visitz MY kitty kat dok-tor!

2009-10-14T15:49:00.005-04:00

I heareded MY hoomin bean talkz to MY vet hoomin bean boutz me dis mawnin'. OK?

MY hoomin bean he sayz dat he makez a-pointz-ment fir ME! Dat aintz nice! OK?

MY hoomin bean tellz MY kitty kat dok-tor dat da hairz iz cominz off da bottomz of MY tail wherez MY tail comez outz of my bodyz. OK?

MY hoomin bean sayz dat my bottomz feelz 2 warmz. OK?

I tellz MY silly hoomin bean dat I cantz seez da bottoms of MY tail wherez MY tail comez outz of my bodyz & MY bottomz dunt feelz 2 warmz & I dunt wantz to visitz MY kitty kat dok-tor!!!! OK?

And ifz WE goez to visitz MY kitty kat dok-tor I aint takinz NO NASSY PILLZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK?

My hoomin bean knoweded wherez I be

2009-10-10T00:47:00.008-04:00

My hoomin bean makez dis sillyz tingie. OK?

Ain't dat sillyz? My hoomin bean knoweded wherez I be! I be outsidez, kattin' awond! OK?

MY Peace Globie Tingie

2009-10-06T12:40:00.004-04:00

Der be a bery coldz wainz outsidez. So, I be insidez & I makez my hoomin bean helpz me wiff my Peace Globie Tingie. OK?

Ain't dat a nice Peace Globie Tingie?

Lookee Whatz MY Hoomin Bean Dune fir ME

2009-10-02T04:30:00.006-04:00

It be koldz now. MY hoomin bean telled ME dat it aintz bery koldz but I tinkz dat it be bery bery kold. OK?

So MY hoomin bean he putz dis thingie dat makez it be warmz in his baffroom. It aint MY baffroom 'cause I can baffz myselfz and I dunt getz in no nassy wasserz. OK?

Dis tingie makez da baffroom realz warmz. OK?

Den MY hoomin bean he putz nice towelie tingie on da floorz and I makez it intoz a nesty beddie fir ME! OK? And I sleepz nice and warms. OK?

Mr. Sun Comed Outz to PLayz Wiff ME

2009-09-28T13:39:00.006-04:00

No nassy wainz todayz. I hab MY ownz sunbeamz to playz wiff! See:

OK?

MY Hoomin Bean Sayz dat Autumnz Iz Now

2009-09-22T17:06:00.010-04:00

I sitz at da doorz an I watchez da nassy wasserz fallz downz an I ain't happyz. OK?

Sooooooz, MY hoomin bean sayz, "Alex, it's Autumn now. Soon the leaves will be changing color and falling to the ground and you can chase the falling leaves and roll around in the piles of leaves like you do every autumn."

OK? I likez to playz wiff da leafz! I likez dat a bigz bunch! OK?

Misser Sun Iz Gone!

2009-09-20T08:34:00.003-04:00

Misser Sun goed awayz. Now der be lotz ob nassy rainz!

I iz notz berry happyz. OK?

Pikturez

2009-09-12T22:27:00.018-04:00

Hi kitty katz & woofie doggiez & hoomin beanz! Down dere iz more pikturez ob ME! OK?

Dud U Seez Dis!

2009-09-09T07:17:00.003-04:00

Why wouldz a kitty kat do dis? Dunt dat silliez kat knowed dat wasser iz nassy?

I Getz da Deskie!

2009-08-12T22:27:00.015-04:00

MY hoomin bean tellz eber-bodiez dat...

Fir longz timez my hoomin bean an ME aint gotz no tel-e-fone or da Internetz. OK?

So MY hoomin bean dunt sitz at our deskie bery muchie, so I getz to takez ober our deskie! OK?

Posi-i-tive Day

2009-07-31T13:29:00.007-04:00

Dis iz Posi-i-tive Day. OK? I tink dat I iz to sayz nice tingz todayz. OK?

I tink it be berry berry nice fir my hoomin bean to rubz my furz whenz I be nappiez. OK?

OK?

Ms. Kitty

2009-07-30T12:34:00.005-04:00

U 'memberz Ms. Kitty?

Ms. Kitty goez ober da Rainbow Bridgie dis morningz. OK?

Carol, Ms. Kitty's hoomin mommy, writez 'boutz her HERE.

MY silliez hoomin bean duntz letz ME in da housey

2009-07-23T18:41:00.003-04:00

Da odder nightz my hoomin bean callz my namez whilez I iz kattin roundz an I pre-tendz notz to hearz him. OK? Den he goez in our beddy an sleptz! OK? An he dunt wakes up whenz I scratchez atz da doorz. OK? An I haz to waitz on da porchie tilz fourz of da clockz in da mornin! OK?

Dat aintz berry nice ob MY hoomin bean. OK?

My Berry Berry Silliez Hoomin Bean

2009-07-16T19:32:00.013-04:00

Lookz whatz MY silliez hoomin bean makez nowz!

I waz NOTZ cat-nip-pied! I waz jist nappiez! OK?

In caze u wonnerz boutz Ms. Kitty, she dunt hurtz but she dunt canz climbz & jumpz likez she dun whenz she iz a young kitty kat. OK?

Maybe u likez to goez & purrz or woofiez atz Ms. Kitty & her hoomin here. OK?

Alexicon Iz da "Cool Cat Site of the Day"

2009-07-15T07:01:00.004-04:00

Lookee whatz I gets!

Awarded by:Pet Supplies Place

Cats Cat Collars Cat Toys Cat Supplies

Pet Store Pet Products Pet Supply Pets

Pet Directory - Candles Baby Crafts Company

Aint dat nice?

OK?

Ms. Kitty Dunt Feelz Good

2009-07-12T21:28:00.005-04:00

My Kitty Kat Fwend, Ms. Kitty, iz 20 yearz old & she dunt feelz berry goodz. OK?

Pleaze sayz pwayerz fir Ms. Kitty & tinkz nice tings aboutz Ms. Kitty. OK?

Andz maybez u canz drops by the bloggie thingie of Ms. Kitty'z hoomin bean, A Peace Carol, and sayz sumpin nice to Ms. Kitty.

OK?

Lookz Whatz MY Silly Bean Dooded

2009-07-08T20:33:00.005-04:00

Hi all U kitty katz n woofie doggiez n hoomin beanz! Seez whatz MY silly hoomin bean sayz aboutz ME:

Aint dat sillyz!

OK?

Hab a Funz Day!

2009-07-04T09:38:00.007-04:00

I hopez dat all U kitty katz & woofie doggiez & hoomin beanz habz a

But I dunt likez dem nassy

OK?

Lookz Whatz MY Silly Hoomin Bean Makez

2009-07-02T20:27:00.003-04:00

Ain't dat silliez?

Butz maybez my hoomin bean reallyz makez dem steakies fir US on da Fourthz ob Julyz! OK?

Whatz I dun dooz todayz

2009-06-23T18:26:00.000-04:00

Todayz I playz n rollz roundz on our kon-cretie porch:

Den I comez insidez our housie.

Den I nappiez wiff MY hoomin bean.

OK?

Lotz ob Piktures ob ME

2009-06-20T16:03:00.023-04:00

The Taylor CatSSSSS sayed dat dey likez 2 sees pikturez ob ME! OK?

Soooooooo, deez iz a lotz ob piturez ob ME doingz whatz kitty katz doz. OK?

Pz. Sz. ~ Happyz Fawer'z Dayz to MY hoomin bean, Sometimes Times Saintly Nick. OK?

Hab U readed da LOL Cat Bible?

2009-06-17T16:58:00.005-04:00

MY hoomin bean gotz allz kindz ob hoomin beanz comingz in2 our housey nowZ! Der be (dis is my bean'z spellingz): a nurse, a physical therapist, an occupational therapist, and a physican's assistant coming ebber weeks an sometimez 2 an 3 timez in a weekz! I dunt likez it cauz I haz to hidez when deez hoomin beanz comez into OUR housey so day dunt picks me upz an playz wiff me likez I be a dolly or sumpin. OK?

But dat ain't whyz I writez dis bloggie postie. OK? I writez it cuz I is a LOL cat (kat) an my hoomin bean and me we jist find da LOL Cat Bible. Here iz anz xamplez ob it dat my hoomin bean (u knownz he iz beenz to semi-nary an iz or-dained, dunt u?) sayz iz froms MARKZ 1, whatzeber that iz:

K, I just telz u this, but I telz u agin. Ceiling Cat haz son name Happy Cat. This hiz stori:2 Wise catz sed, Ceiling Cat send wai smrt d00d.3 He make thingz redy 4 Happy Cat.4Hiz name John. He wantz us to dunk in watr. (wtf? iz dat srsly?)5 Catz let him do thiz crzy thing tho. Tehy dunk in watr. Srsly6 John warez crzy clothez and eatz bugz (he no haz cheezburgr?)7 He sez, "New cat come, him wai betr thn me.8 I dunkz u with waterz but he givz u Hovr Cat. Srsly.
9 So Happy Cat, he come to John like John sez. John dunkxz Happy Cat with waterz.10 Ceiling Cat sends Hovr Cat.11 Ceiling Cat sez "This mai Kitteh. He roxxors an I'ze happy."12 Thn teh Hovr Cat sends him 2 wild.13 An he was in wilderness long tyme (srsly, 40 dais!). An Basement Cat wuz showin' lotza evilz cheezburgrz an catnipz to him. An he wuz wit teh sqirrelz, an anjelz wer giving him srsly betur cheezburgrz an brayded hiz fur.
14 Aftr John wuz arrestid (PWND!!!1), Happy Cat came into Galilee, sez to all teh kittinz about teh gud newz of teh Ceiling Cat,15 an he sayd, "iz tyme, kittenz! Ceiling Cat'z kingdim is here! 4saek yr evl waiz an beleev in teh good newz!" (awsum, srsly!)

OK? Ifz u wantz to readz morez ob the LOL Cat Bible den you canz usez ur mousey to clickz on da blue linky thingie upz at da topz. OK?

It's Caturday!

2009-06-13T11:23:00.002-04:00

It's Carurday! So I getz upz beforez da sun an iz outsidez kattin' aroundz!

OK?

Somez timez

2009-06-05T15:34:00.004-04:00

Somez timez a kitty kat haz 2 nappiez inz whateverz spacez he findz.

OK?

Silly Bean!

2009-05-31T08:08:00.007-04:00

A-wex! A-wax! A-Wax Dee Kat!

Datz da wayz my hoomin bean callz 2 me dis morningz whenz I is outz sidez kattin’ awoundz. OK?

Den when my bean seez me wunningz a-krozz da yardz, he sayz:

Getz U whitez azz an blackz an gwayz tailz in dis housey!

An I comez inz day housey and den my sillyz hoomin beanz he sayz 2 me:

Dun u knowz whatz timez it iz? Itz beez 6 AM an U bin kattin’ awoundz fir allz nitez!

Silly bean! Ob kourze I dunt knowz whatz timez it iz! I aint gotz no paw watch 2 tellz da timez! OK?

Aint he a sillyz hoomin bean!

Nowz I iz gonna kat nappies.

OK?

Iz Mem-o-ral Dayz

2009-05-25T00:01:00.002-04:00

Iz Mem-o-ral Dayz here in da U. S. ob A.

I hopez dat you hoomin beanz re-mem-berz allz da hoomin beanz who diez in nassy war. OK?

I knowz dat der hab beenz lotz ob kitty katz and woofie doogiez who hab missed der hoomin beanz dat haz crosseded da rainbow bridge in nassy warz. OK?

Itz NO Funz Whenz Hoomin Bean Is Sickz!

2009-05-23T06:41:00.007-04:00

Hi, kitty katz and woofie doggiez and hoomin beanz! I srry dat I aint been writinz dis week. OK?

Lass Fry-day my hoomin bean he getz bery sickz cause he canst getz his breaffz and hoomin beanz comez in a trucky-like tingie and dey putz MY hoomin bean onz a lill beddy wiff wheelz and dey carriez himz outz ob our housey and dey putz him inz dat trucky-like tingie and dey drivezez himz awayz wiff dat trucky-like tingie makinz bery LOUDZ noise. OK?

It OK nowz; MY hoomin bean comez homez da next day, Cat-ur-day, and he breafz OK nowz. But nows we haz new hoomin beanz comez to our housey. One hoomin bean comez to helpz MY hoomin bean learnz to walkz better andz da udder hoomin beanz comez because in da hosi-pit-ul dey learnz dat MY homin bean haz #2 typez di-a-be-tez and she teachez MY hoomin bean howz to libs wiff it. OK?

MY hoomin bean tellz me dat dem hoomin beanz be cominz to our housey ebber week now and dat I needs to notz to be fraidz of dem and runz and hidez when dey comez to our housey! OK? I tryz butz I aint promizez nuffin til I getz to knowz dem and findz outz what kindz of hoomin beanz dey iz. OK?

I lookz fir MY hoomin bean 2 comez homed.

Happy Momma Katz Day

2009-05-10T20:15:00.005-04:00

Happy Momma Katz Day, Eberbodiez!

OK?

I Takez Good Carez ob MY Bean

2009-05-07T11:04:00.007-04:00

Againz MY hoomin bean aintz feelingz bery goodz. OK?

But I iz takingz bery bery good carez ob MY bean.

See:

OK?

I Teached MY Bean a New Twick

2009-05-02T06:26:00.010-04:00

Hi, kitty katz an woofie doggiez an hoomin beanz. Guess whatz! I teached MY bean a new twick! OK?

Longz timez ago I teached MY hoomin bean dat if I clawz hiz legz whenz he iz sittin atz OUR puter he haz to getz up and ifz I walkz to da front door openz it fir me or if I walkz to MY table an getz on topz MY bean haz to feedz me. OK?

Butz MY silly hoomin bean dunt knowz whenz I wantz some kat-nippiesz. OK? Soooooooo, affer long timez of ME teaching MY bean (he aint bery smartz, u knowz) now my silly hoomin bean knowz dat whenz I rollz on da floorz I wants kat-nippiesz! OK?

Ceptz whenz I dunt wantz no kap-nippiesz. OK?

OUR Deskie

2009-04-24T16:59:00.008-04:00

The utter dayz I waz nappiez on OUR deskie and I stretchez realz longz an I pushez somez ob my silly hoomin'z stuffz off da deskie onto da floorz an my hoomin bean he aint happiez bout dat but I tellz my hoomin bean dat all kitty katz stretchez realz longz an he betterz notz putz any ob hiz tingiez on OUR deskie dat he dunt wantz on da floorz!

OK?

I hopez dat all u kitty katz an woofie doggiez an wittle wabbitz an hoomin beanz hab a nicey weekendz cause it berry nice here inz Kentucky an da sun shinez bright an da tem-per-a-turez is 87 F (whateverz dat meanz).

OK?

Happiez Earff Day Eber Bodiez

2009-04-22T03:45:00.000-04:00

I hopez dat all u kitty katz an woofie doggiez an birdiez an hoomin beanz haz a happiez Earff Day!

OK?

Kitty Katz Dunt Likez Pir-atez

2009-04-19T21:41:00.005-04:00

I dunt likez likez pir-atez. I tinkz dey ar nassy hoomin beanz. OK?

So I sayz:

OK?

Guess Whatz?

2009-04-15T00:01:00.000-04:00

Guess whatz? My hoomin beanz getz ME my ownz brouwzer jist fir me ob my bery ownz!

An MY hoomin bean getz me my ownz G-mailz accountie ob MY bery ownz!

An MY hoomin bean getz me a new blogger dashyboard of my bery ownz!

Butz u knowz dat eben wiff all dem nice tingiez dat my hoomin bean getz me, that...

OK?