Hi. I be Alex. OK?
I ownz a hoomin bean named Sometimes Saintly Nick. OK?
Before ME and my hoomin bean movez to dis a-partz-ment I getz to playz outsidez and I hab lotz ob kitty kat fwiendz. OK?
But nowz da hoomin beanz here dunt letz me playz outsidez. Dey dunt letz no kitty katz playz outsidez. So I lookz outz da windowz for kitty katz butz I dunt seez no kitty katz. OK?
Dis be Anne. She comez to out partmentz to libez wiff us and helpz pay da rentz. OK?
Dis be Cain, da kitty kat dat ownz Anne. OK?
I twyz to be Cain's kitty kat buddy butz Cain be skaredy kat an he jumpz on ME an bwings blud to da scuffy partz ob my neck, I dunt likes dat. OK?
So now I hab a kastle neath dis chair an I hizzes at Cain when he comes by an sometimez we fightz an Cain he wunz awayz cause I winz da fightz. OK?
Sometimez Mz Anne she takez Cain fir a ridez. OK?
Den I comez outz frum neathz my chair an I nappiez unner my ownz sunbeam. OK?
MY hoomin bean tinkz dat he canz makez Cain an ME be buddies if we sharz kitty kat nippies. Cain doez da nip an getz sillyz but I jist lookz at da nip an at sillyz Cain. OK?
I dunt knowz if I eber be buddiez wiff Cain. I jist tinkz boutz it some moorz whilez I baffz. OK?